Love, Sex and Dating Articles -> Just Get Over It - Part 1

To get dumped it’s not unusual, there could be said. In addition, most people tend to get on their feet once the emotional turmoil has subsided from coming apart. The problem is what goes on in the meantime. Therein the likelihood of backlash could lie idle. Hence mulling over it or pretending that someone who mattered so much could be easily forgotten, would be pointless. In a seemingly case of neither harsh nor condescend would do but the balancing act stricken between the two instead.

When the bottom line reads out coping with a broken heart nothing is 100% sure; each individual would respond differently to the same stimuli.

Still, a hint might come handy, as of, the pictures in which both appeared together done away with, no need to oblate them either, for all that; they still represent a page turned in the book of life.  Plus, those mementos or reminders of your ex must go, since these, at the moment, could induce flashbacks. Down the line, you might even get to laugh about this one, but it’d be better if you could lay it all off for time being. Places in which both used to enjoy together would be the next best thing to do if neglected. Once someone could become extremely edgy from this point on, anything from scents, backdrops to resemblances and even sounds could get in the way of coming to terms with it. Never mind ditching it altogether, just push it in the back of mind for awhile. Come to think of it, there might be rebounds just like it would out of the beaten track, despite the change in surroundings. It’d ask for a great deal of self-determination yet again. Some others however would dodge anyone who possibly got anything to do with their exes. And whoever you met through your ex should be placed aside as well from now on. Take it as a hint, even more so since these louts would mean news from your lost passion and perhaps could spoil your day with lines like “he/she doesn’t seem to get over it” or “he/she is really having a time of life”. Either way it could rebound on you if said in a dark hour of the day.

It goes without saying that neither of you would have the means to know what goes on each other’s mind. Otherwise, one could sound as if being upset yet couldn’t care less and not being bothered at all or else, could pretend to be doing well when actually were just as bad if not worse than you are.

As for backtracking, beware of it. In what, the long for a phone call, for seeing each other again and perhaps scoring a quickie for the sake of old times could root in.  Don’t get carried away though, because the mood could be single-sided.  And that would be the extent of it whether it clicked or else. Not to mention the other had feelings too and could be feeling disconnected and careless just like you are. Leaving a great passion behind is quite tough in spite of the strong feelings involved.

Although there might be wise in the beginning. If you can’t help it, by all means try your best and be casual about it. Therefore chasing waterfalls and raising your hopes about one another mustn’t become the frame of mind. And keeping it as a leg in, should both decide to get together ever again.

By Anne Griza
Psychologist

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